My initial reasons for creating this blog centered on the concept of accountability, a way to force myself to continue and keep going, to not lose focus. What I discovered even more importantly was that through other awesome blogs and bloggers there was an enormous support network providing encouragement and motivation. Most importantly, I recently have realized that this blog is no longer my primary source for accountability… instead my primary source was myself, I am accountable to myself first and foremost.
While Triathlon training is a new experience and slant on losing weight and getting in shape, this obviously is not my first weight loss rodeo. Like allot of people who are overweight a good deal of their lives I have gone through many phases of previous successes and failures in enhancing my body image by losing weight. In these previous attempts I usually decide it is time to do something. I get my eating habits in order and put together an exercise plan (these were usually focused around lifting weights primarily with little cardio). Then for a month I would successfully exercise and eat appropriately. I wold see some success. But after that month, something would happen: car trouble, extended work hours, pizza Fridays, injury … what ever it was it would derail me a day. Then for the next week I would spend every day saying tomorrow I would get back on track till a week went by and then a month and then several months. Luckily for me I often kept off the weight I lost, but this was my pattern for my adult life. This is how I went from 365 several years ago to 320 this year.
But, this current training stint is different, it even feels different. I think its largely because I found accountability in myself and have found reasonable achievable goals. Up until my recent doctor enforced hiatus I have been training and staying on track for over 3 months. We are not talking easy workout here. This blog has initially helped with that. Also, my goal to get in the best shape of my life and to do a season of triathlons has also greatly helped in creating a very real measurable goal.
I realized recently through my forced hiatus that what I really have gained above everything is self accountablity. I am accountable to myself and no body else. Instead of being happy that I get to sit on the couch and enjoy relaxing I am trying to find ways to stay active, to keep myself going. I have truly realized that I have to stay true to myself and my goals, I do not want to let myself down. For the first time I feel accountable to me. I have to continue triathlon training for myself. Not the people who read my blog (even though I love everyone who shares this journey with me), not my family.. no body but myself. This realization might be the greatest take away I have from this down time. For the first time in my life I am at the wheel and in control. I am truly accountable to the most important person, myself.
Til next time…